Omar Cain
As you already know from my last blog, Omar Cain is a CNA extraordinaire! After seeing his video, I just had to talk with him and find out more about him. What I found is a man lucky enough to have found his calling and the desire and ability to share what he knows with others in such a way that they “get” it. In addition to his CNA work, he also trains CNA students and those thinking about the field. I also asked him to share some tips on how the families can best support their parents in a nursing home or assisted living community. Here they are:
1) Visit frequently.
If see the family more, won’t just be sitting around “waiting to die”. Visits give your aging loved one something to look forward to – and something to “show off” to their friends about.
(BTW – I want to add that, although it is ideal that it is the family visiting, that’s not always possible. There are, however, lots of other people who can such as family members of other residents, college kids who are exploring this field, people from their house of worship, social workers, etc. )
2) Bring pictures of family members.
Not only do pictures keep them current as the family grows and help your loved one stay part of the family (especially pictures of the family participating activities) it also gives you something to talk about when visiting.
3) Let the staff know if your aging loved one has a hobby or interests.
The staff is always looking for activities that will get residents to participate so why not what interests your loved one.
4) If possible, try to arrange a periodic home visit.
Of course, this depends on the resident. Some are OK with this, some not. Some residents never want to leave the building, some not even the wing. Others may be thrilled to leave but very resistant to returning to the facility. In either case, taking them out may not be best. But for those that are comfortable going out and happy to return, it’s a huge treat.
5) Visit on the holidays.
Get as many family members together as possible to visit on the holidays. Shows your parent they’re special, allows them to show you off, and allows them to brag about the family (and that their family came to visit).
As Omar says, “I know these sound pretty simple but the littlest things go a long way!”
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I am Omar’s younger sister and I have to say he has always been very good with people. he inspired me to go back to School and Now Im a Patient Cre Technician working at a hospital. He has come a long way or as he likes to say “It’ been a long road” but he is the best of the best and Im glad to call him my big brother.
Hi Juanita – Thanks so much for your comment. Your brother is a wonderful guy and obviously it runs in the family!
Barbara
I have been living in an Assisted Living Residence in a Seniors Retirement Home for the past four years. I have been diagnosed with Early Stage Alzheimer’s Disease. During the first two years in the residence, I would go and visit my family at their home on weekends and on holidays. During that same time period, my family came to visit me at the residence about six times. I am still capable of visiting them at their home but they don’t reciprocate by coming and visiting me at my home. Why should I go out of my way and visit them if they don’t come to visit me?
You have every reason to be angry . . . and hurt. In fact, I’m angry and hurt for you! That said, however, if you want them to be a part of your life and you want to be a part of theirs, I strongly suggest that you talk with one or all of them. Honestly tell them how you feel. Perhaps something like:
“I have to tell you that I’m angry and hurt. I don’t know why you don’t come to visit me here. I’m guessing it’s because you think it’s more pleasant for me to go to your home. Or maybe it’s because it upsets you that this is where I live now. But the reality is, this is my home now. At some point I’m not going to be able to visit you and I need to know you’re going to be here for me – as uncomfortable as that may make you. And if you won’t visit me when I’m in good shape, I am afraid you won’t be here when I’m in bad shape either.”
Hopefully after you talk with them, everything will change. However, the bottom line is, should you go out of your way to visit them if they don’t visit you? Only you can answer that but I beg you – please do not let that be the line you draw in the sand.
Barbara
Omar is a breath of fresh air,
who obviously can inspire,
and is a man who knows how to care,
with passion in him like fire.
That’s my rap….ha ha
On a serious note….I am glad to have run across Omar on the web.
Thanks for stopping by and for your little rap too, Robert! Yes, Omar is a breath of fresh air. Very happy to have met him!
I want to say thank you so much for the updates and you are so true and my father Mr. James Edward Mayo is a very lucky man to have you as his nurse and so am i so please keep doing what you do. Because when it is all done you are the one .
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